Holiday Burnout

It is just a few days away from Christmas and I find it really hard to get excited this year. I feel like I have put in way to much work for this holiday and it has left me wondering "Is it really worth it?". It seems that the mom always get stuck with the holiday chores. It is my job to get all gifts for my husbands family, my own, the kids, wrap them, distribute them, figure out what to put in stockings, what to eat on the big day, fill out and mail cards and packages, get the business cards picked out and mailed and so on. I will admit that I used to enjoy this so I took it upon myself but now that I have two very young children, and a business to help run, I want to step back. I don't want to do everything. I don't even want to do half of it. This years holiday work has resulted in some bitterness on my part. I will admit to reading cards sent to us, smiling and then throwing the picture-less ones away just because I don't want them cluttering up my bar. I have no interest in getting the kids pictures done with Santa or doing any holiday activities that require any waiting in line. So my goal for the new year is to figure out how to step back and not spend so much time on the holidays. Any suggestions would be most appreciated.

Black Friday Deals!

On this lovely snowy Thanksgiving I am busy cooking a turkey that myself, my children and my mom will not be eating. We only eat fish meat so we will be having lobster (the suffering we go through!) for our Thanksgiving dinner but I still cook a turkey for my sister, husband and my cousin. We have so much to be thankful for this year! Our business, our family, our health and of course SALES! My favorite sale on Black Friday and the only one I will be going to this year is the Goodwill sale. Most of the country's Goodwill stores have a almost everything 50% off for Black Friday and the day after. Some do it for the whole three day weekend. They will be opening an hour early at 8am. Goodwill does not really do a good job of advertising this so I thought I would post about it. I only found it by accident one year when I happened in to one as a last minute decision.

I love Goodwill. If you have more time then money or just want a good deal it is the place for you. It takes time to look through things there but it is well worth it. I love to get my son like new books for $1 or less, baking-were, and clothing for myself and my hubby. I remember finding a Boppy with a cover there for $2, new they cost $40. The only thing that I would not bother with would be the baby clothing. Everyone takes their nice clothing to the used kids stuff stores like Once Upon A Child to get money. I also like that I am not buying new stuff and therefore helping to keep things out of the landfill. Save money and the planet, a double win!

Drinking the Cool-aid

Well I am not one to jump on bandwagons but I am about to "drink the Cool-aid" so to speak. I am in the planing stages of starting Dave Ramsey's 7 steps. Just recently, I was at the library picking up some books I had ordered and Dave Ramsey's book Total Money Makeover was sitting on counter. I started to flip through it and saw a clip about a couple making $30,000 a year that did his program. I decided to get it right there. It was free right?

Our family does not have massive debt but we did just start a business so we have some. Even before reading the book, we had decided to sell the riding mower we bought to get rid of the payment. We have gotten out of debt before but something always comes up (usually emergencies but not always) and we end up back in. Once you are in a little, it is so easy to get in a little more for something that is not an emergency.

Dave Ramsey's plan is simple and seemed to fit my family. We don't have a high income or huge credit card debt. I am a stay at home mom and it is important to us that I stay one. I don't like how many other financial gurus answer is just for the mom to get a job outside the home. That will not work for us. I also don't like how many plans seem targeted at higher earners then we are. Dave's plan made it seem possible to get rich with out having to make more money. Another thing is that no one seems to speak to the self employed. We don't have access to a 401k so I don't care to hear about it as the be all and end all thing. Dave has worksheets in the back with alternatives for those that are self employed. The last thing is that Dave's plan addresses people's real behavior. I am a very cheap person. I am capable of having a credit card sit in my wallet unused for years. My husband, bless him, is not. He is not the type to get in to debt on small things but when he wanted to start a business, he just went out and charged it. I needed a plan that would convince and reward him enough that he would stick with it. So here I am, about to take the first step to a credit free life. Wish me good luck!

Fall Fun in the City

I am amazed how many free things there are to do with your kids during the fall. In our city the parks hosts at least 4 different Halloween parties in different parts of the city, some nature walks, and even some evening spooky stories over a campfire with hot cider. All of these events are free or under $5. Then there are all of the harvest parties hosted by local churches. Our church is hosting a Samhain party the night before Halloween and a haunted house the day of. Many of my mom friends have invited me to their churches harvest festivals as well. Then there are the parties hosted by my local moms groups. Each group is having one for the kids and in years past they have also had a party just for the adults.

How do you find out about these fun cheap parties? The web of course! Most cities have a parks and rec department and it will have its own web page with all the happenings of the month. Church parties may be a bit harder to find if you don't go to that particular church but all you have to do is ask around and you might find something fun to go to. I found all of my moms groups through Meetup.com. I love Meetup, I have met all of my mom friends through this website that was designed to get people with similar interests to meet up in real life. Some groups charge a fee but it is usually no more then $10 a year. Others get sponsored and so don't charge a fee at all. All it takes is a little time and any city slicker can find some fun, cheap, things to do during the fall with their little ones!

Cloth Diapers at Target and Walmart

It would be so great to be able to get cloth diapers at a big chain like Target or Walmart. Here in my city we have one very small and very limited store that sells cloth diapers. It has limited selection, and limited hours and many moms and dads just don't know it exists. I think that many more people might be at least willing to consider the idea of cloth if they could SEE the covers, Snappies, and diapers. I know that for me it was really hard when I had to buy everything sight unseen over the internet, with only pictures to look at. I was unemployed and pregnant at the time and had nothing better to do then spend hours researching what diapers to buy. Most people don't have that kind of time. Cloth can be very confusing for a beginner and it is even harder to try to pick what you might like (pocket diaper, prefolds, all-in-ones) when you can't even see them. Then you have to pay shipping too. There are many places that the only store around is a Walmart. These people are (most likely) not going to drive way out of there way to see some diapers. Think of all the money it would save people to put their babies in cloth!

Sign the petition to tell Target, Walmart and other retailers to carry cloth diapers!

Toddlers and poop

Life with a toddler is never dull. In fact it can be quite stressful. I used to work at a daycare were we primarily took care of toddlers and I loved the job. I thought toddlers were just "so fun!". Then I was a nanny to three girls 2, 4, and 6 and that was also "so fun!". Now I would describe toddlers as just "so stressful!". Right now my son loves poop. Now I know there are plenty of toddlers that do not like poop but I was lucky enough not to have one of those lovely children. Lately he thinks it is so funny to poop in the tub when he is getting a bath. I was doing laundry in the other room one day when I hear a splat! I come in and he is slinging handfuls of poop on to the floor. Then there was the time that I look over and my son is putting his finger in his butt and then putting it in his mouth! Or when I came in to his room one day (this was a while ago) to find that he had taken off his pants and diaper and was dancing all over his poop on his crib mattress. It took me an hour to clean that up. My son is a really sweet boy but there are some days when I just want to say "wake me when it's over".

Cloth Diapering on the Cheap: Rashes, and other odd things

There are always odd things that come up when cloth diapering. One is the dreaded diaper rash. Some people say that you are less likely to get diaper rash with cloth. I think that depends on why your kid is getting the rash. If you child is sensitive to the chemicals that are in paper diapers then yes, they will get less rashes with cloth. If however your child gets diaper rash from having pee against their skin (like my children) then you may get more from cloth diapers. The solution to this is fleece. You simply get some fleece (from the fabric store or an old blanket) and cut it in to diaper sized rectangles and place them in the diapers. This will keep your child's skin dry and rash free. You can wash the liners with the diapers and reuse them.

For wipes I use white wash cloths. We use white because our other wash cloths are not white so we can tell the difference. I went to Target and for $5 I got a pack of 12 wash cloths. I bought 3 of these packs. Then I just use a squirt bottle of water to get them wet and wipe the baby up with them. They can be washed with the diapers just the same way. Really why not use cloth wipes when you are cloth diapering anyways right?

Some babies are super heavy wetters at night. For them it would be a good idea to get some overnight diapers. Many different bands make them. They cost a bit more but you only need a few of them. I got 3 because I do my wash every 3 days. I got the Happy Hempy pocket diapers. Hemp is very absorbent and works well for overnights. They cost $18 but like I said, I only needed 3. There are other hemp diapers that will work too.

Cloth diapering is really not as hard as it sounds and the pay off money wise and environmentally are huge. So give it a try! If it does not work out you can sell your stash and make back at least some of your money. Some websites even have a "try it" package that will let you return all or part of the diapers and get your money back.

Cloth Diapering on the Cheap: Taking Care of Your Diapers

Taking care of prefold diapers is really easy. It is one of the reasons I prefer prefolds to other types of diapers. When you get your prefolds (if they are new) they will be flat and kind of rough feeling. You need to run them through the wash three times before you use them. Just run them on hot/whites and put in a little bit of detergent. You can just wash them three times back to back, you don't need to dry them in between. When that is done, dry them and they should be fluffed up nicely and ready for use. You do not need to wash your covers before using them.

Next you will need a diaper pail to put the diapers in. Any kind will do, it is up to you. You do not need to put water or bleach in the pail. In fact you should never soak your diapers in bleach unless you want them to last for all of two weeks and then fall apart on you. I just put a plastic bag in my pail but if you want you can get what is called a "wet bag". This is a water proof, washable bag, that you put diapers in and then throw in the wash with the diapers. You can get them on any web site that sells cloth diapers.

Now you need to know how to wash your diapers. There are some people that will tell you that you need to pre-soak, or pre-rinse, and then do another rinse or some such nonsense but I disagree. I think these people are making it sound way to complicated and scaring people away from cloth diapering. All you need to do is set your wash to whites, put in the detergent, and wash them on hot. That is ALL! It is really simple. I should note that I do not know if it is different for front loader washers. I have a top loader. For detergent you want to use about 1/4 of the amount of detergent you would normally use. You do need to be careful about the brand of detergent you use. I know that Tide Free and Arm N Hammer Free both work well and are easily available at most stores.

The last thing most people wonder about is poop. If your baby is not eating solids yet, you don't need to do anything. The liquid they poop can go right in to the wash and will come out just fine. If your child is eating solids then you need to make a decision. You can do poop the cheap gross way or for very little more money you can do it the easy way. The cheap gross way is to get a small bucket and when you get a poop that will not just roll off the diaper, you put the whole diaper in the bucket of water. Then when you are ready to wash, you take out the diaper to wash it and all the poop will stay in the water. Then dump the water in the toilet. The easy way is to either buy a sprayer that hooks to your toilet for about $35 and spray the poop off or to buy a roll of liners for about $6.50. I use the liners. You get a roll of 100 and then just tear one off and put it in the diaper. When your kid poops, you just take the liner and flush it down the toilet. They look about like dryer liners.

Your covers can be washed with the diapers. You can put them in the dryer but they will last longer if you pull them out after washing and just let them air dry. If you go with Velcro diapers, don't forget to use your laundry tabs. These are the little squares of Velcro next to the tabs. You just fold the tab down on the square and then you won't have chains of diaper covers in your wash. Next time I will talk about overnights, diaper rash, cloth wipes and other odd items.

Cloth Diapering on the Cheap: Amassing your Stash

Cloth diapering has long been seen as a good way to save money as compared with paper diapers. I will not debate whether or not it is more environmentally friendly then paper (although the WHO has declared cloth the winner due to the ability to wash and reuse on multiple children) but it is almost always cheaper. But how much cheaper is up to you. I started cloth diapering my son when he was born with the idea of being as cheap as possible. Cloth diapers come in many different brands and types, it can be very overwhelming to a newcomer to decided what to get. I will go over the CHEAPEST (in my opinion) way to cloth diaper.

First you start with what diapers to buy. There are three types of cloth diapers: Prefolds with covers, pockets with inserts, and all in ones. Prefolds are the cheapest to buy, last the longest, and are the easiest to wash. These are what I went with. You simply need to buy a bunch of prefold diapers and wash them three times to get them nice and fluffy and they are ready for use. Prefolds come in Indian and Chinese, bleached and un-bleached. There is no great difference in price or quality, you can get whatever type you want. DO NOT buy Gerber prefolds. These are not meant to be used as real diapers no matter what it says on the package. You can buy prefolds used as well. A good website to help you with this is diaperswapers.com. It is sort of like Crag's list for diapers. How many should you buy? That depends on how often you want to wash. I have three dozen small sized and that is about three days worth of diapers. As for sizes, that is also up to you. I did not bother with the new born sized diapers. My new born fit in to the regular ones with only a few poop blow outs until he was 8 lbs. Then we had no more blow outs unless he was put in to paper diapers.

Next you need to decide what covers to get. This is entirely personal preference. You can buy used covers but be careful not to get them too used. They ware out much faster then the prefolds themselves. Many people choose to get a verity of covers and then decide what their favorites are and buy more of those. I personally love the Bumies Whisper Wrap covers. I love Velcro for middle of the night changes (I can't handle snaps when I am tired) and love the cute pictures on the covers. Some people really love snaps though, it is up to you. I also have some Thirstys that are good too but they are not as cute. Six covers was enough for me to get though three days before I needed to wash. I have small covers (8 lbs - 15 lbs) and medium covers (15 lbs - 30 lbs). My son is almost two and we have not needed to buy the large size even though he is over 30 lbs now. I do not use pins or Snappies but if you prefer, Snappies are the way to go. They are pretty cheap and really easy to use. Just look them up on YouTube for instructions.

If you want a nice all in one package that has everything you need until your baby goes over 15 lbs I would recommend the Bumies Cotton Diaper Kit. You can find it on Amazon or through Thanksmama.com This kit has three dozen diapers, six covers, and a roll of liners for about $150. This is enough to go for about three days before washing. They also have a 15-30 lb kit as well. And no, they are not paying me (although I wish they were!) Next time I will go over the cheapest way to take care of them.

Amara Mae is here!

Our daughter was born at home March 13th 2010! She came at 8:59 pm (PST) after just 8 hours of labor and 18 minutes of pushing. Thanks to Hypnobabies and my wonderful midwife, the labor was calm and went very smoothly. Amara is doing super and I am feeling pretty good myself. Now we are just adjusting to life with two kids and trying to get sleep whenever possible. I am so glad not to be pregnant anymore and that I will not be getting pregnant ever again (hubby is fixed).

Boy pee-pee

So how come no one told me that when you are potty training a boy, one of the biggest issues is finding boy friendly potties and getting them to not pee on the back of their undies when they sit on the potty! When I started out potty training my son, I had no idea that (little) potties are not unisex. There really are boy potties and girl potties. Do they mark this on the packaging? Do they give you any clue whatsoever? NO. I had to go through three potties before I found one that works to keep the pee from spraying over the edge every time.

First I should state that I have no idea if my son is normal. He can not only pee about 4 feet but also pees almost horizontal. He has easily peed over 3 inch pee guards. He hates when I touch his penis while he is peeing so I get one chance to aim it and that is it. He will not do it himself. He also loves to watch himself pee so he angles his hips upwards making it even harder to keep the pee going down. This has led to many embarrassing times at friends houses. "Oh I am so sorry but my son peed on your shower curtain!" This does not make people want to invite you back to their houses. It is also embarrassing having to change my son's pants when he DID go pee on the potty but managed to get most of it on the back of his pants.

I did finally find a potty at the Dollar Store that has a very high back. My son straddles the chair backwards and that solves the peeing over the top problem when we are at home at least. When we go out I keep a wash cloth handy for catching the stream before it hits his pants.

Baby Sprinkles

I am planning my own sprinkle for our baby girl. Sprinkles (I am told) are what you throw when you are having your second child. I hope that it is not too tacky to throw my own. I figure that because I have not registered anywhere and have put in the invites not to bring gifts that it is ok. I felt so proud of myself because I sent out e-vites without messing it up and everyone received them. It sounds silly but I am always afraid of messing things like that up the first time I do things. I am very impressed with how many of my invitees responded the day I sent them out. So much faster then sending invites in the mail. With my son's baby shower, my sister in law insisted that she throw the shower. She is normally a very organized person, and I really trusted that she would do a great job, but she really dropped the ball with my shower. First of all, no one received the invites until a week before the shower and some people did not receive them at all. Then for the shower, there was no games or entertainment just cake and ice cream. It turned out that her whole family had had a very bad flu the week before and she just could not get things together. I wish she would have just told me. I would have been happy to help. It did work out and turned out to be a good party but some of my friends and family were hurt that they did not get an invite. So this time I am going to take care of it myself. My friend has offered to bake us a cake (and she always does a great job) and I have found some games online that look like fun. The only theme will be girl. I am really looking forward to it.